A job where you can make piles of money, without doing any real work

Need a job math, science and engineering graduates? Do you know number? Do you know who to manipulate those numbers into a mathematical model that looks extremely and unnecessarily large, complex and confusing? Does that mathematic model do ABSOLUTELY NOTHING? Then the financial services industry may be looking for an employee like you.

What the fuck does this all MEAN?

It's a growing trend for large financial firms (banks and shit) to get their human capital to create multi-dimensional models to find the patterns behind the buying and selling behavior of stock investors.

Sounds like a lot of bullshit data analysis right?

WRONG

See no matter what kind of a math model you create, doesn't matter if you think your model is the masterwork of a mathematical god or an abomination to the scientific community, the company who hired you to make it has already decided that it is going to be an absolute piece of shit anyway; in fact the company believes that the model will suck so hard, their plan is to bet against everything the model does; in doing so, these companies usually turn a massive profit.

So think about this future math, science and engineering grads, you could have a job that pays a six figure salary, and all you have to do all day is to scribble up any random half ass'd bullshit formula, call it a model then go home and play video games; you do that not because you can get away with it, but because that's actually exactly what your company wants you to do.